[01:14] <`Fiona> fuck
[01:14] <`Fiona> my phone is completely dead
[01:14] <`Fiona> this is not good
[01:14] <Sconn> ?
[01:14] <Sconn> no charger?
[01:14] <`Fiona> it's plugged in
[01:14] <`Fiona> it won't turn on and the charging light isn't coming on
[01:14] <`Fiona> fuck
[01:14] <Sconn> what kind of phone?
[01:14] <`Fiona> smartphone
[01:14] <`Fiona> HTC Diamond
[01:14] <Sconn> take the battery out for starters
[01:14] <Sconn> and the SIM card if you've got one
[01:14] <Sconn> unplug it first, obv.
[01:14] <`Fiona> did the former, no sim card
[01:15] <Sconn> ...weird.
[01:15] <Sconn> did you like...spill something on it or something?
[01:15] <`Fiona> nope
[01:15] <`Fiona> ... wtf
[01:15] <`Fiona> took the battery out a second time
[01:15] <`Fiona> it works now
[01:15] <`Fiona> jesus
[01:16] <Sconn> AM Sconn
<Sconn> yeah, here in the civilized world, we call it welfare
<Sconn> and people need to qualify to get on it.
<Gavin_Storm> we qqualify after 1 year of work or if you have less the 8K in the bank
<Sconn> Yeah. Here, you gotta have like...a few kids and no child support
<Gavin_Storm> you get more if you have kids
<Gavin_Storm> naturally
<Sconn> So who pays for all that?
<Sconn> Do you all, with your taxes?
<Gavin_Storm> national insurance stamp or taxes
<Sconn> Oh righgt.
<Sconn> ...right*
<Sconn> I forgot your government taxes stamps. Which is why my country decided you all sucked and then kicked the shit outta you in two separate wars.
<Sconn> I wish I was 17 again.
<Sconn> But not really
<Sconn> but kinda, 'cause then I could fuck 15 year olds legally
<Sconn> as opposed to the shady way I do it now.
<LCM-Sconn> RS Radio just wouldn't be allowed. <LCM-Sconn> Too damn XXX rated. <LGN-Shik> it'd be lke "And now, The puddy is a banging' and the hooker is a screamin' by RSHC" <LCM-Sconn> Or, "Sconn hasn't masturbated in 42 days" by the Screaming Testes.
[22:41] <Kirghy> I swear that Indy's kin to Hillary Clinton in some way.[22:42] <Sconn> It is my opinion that Hillary's infinitely hotter than Indy.
[22:42] <Sconn> Now, I use that in a relative sense.
[22:42] <Sconn> Not because I think that Hillary's hot.
[22:42] <Sconn> But compared to Indy, she's goddamn Kiera Knightley.
[22:42] <Kirghy> I do concur on all counts
[22:42] <HeavyD> lol
[22:42] <Sconn> </end rant>
<Avera> Its nice to have Shik around though.
<Avera> I will always have an indicator of when hell is about to freeze over...
<Sconn> <ShikAfk> NO BANG SHIKKIE!
<Avera> just judging how far he gets with a girl.
<`Kyle> heh
<`Kyle> if he gets one to his room, call off all bets
<Sconn> Yeah right.
<Sconn> Shik will just do a pussy lunge and get his ass kicked.
<TR_Hawk> you talk like it'd actually happen, kyle
<Sconn> He'll be like, "so...you wanna drin-PUSSY LUNGE UGH!"
<Sconn> And reach maniacally for her crotch.
<Sconn> She's all like "YOU SICK F*CK! ALL I WANTED WAS SOME MATH HELP!"
[22:44] <`JK_Rich> And what's your name, person at Gav's computer. :P
[22:44] <Executer> yay!
[22:44] <Executer> me?
[22:44] <Executer> Erin
[22:44] <Kirghy> o.O
[22:45] <Sconn> I KNEW IT!
[22:45] <Kirghy> No, no, no, no, no....
[22:45] <Sconn> GAV IS SLEEPING WITH INDY!
[22:45] <Sconn> AGUH!
[22:45] <Kirghy> roflmao
[22:45] <`Entropy> rofl
[22:45] * Sconn hides!
[22:45] * Sconn hides A LOT!
<RSJohn> anyone know how i can reduce the ping in JO?
<Sconn> Put on a little tinfoil hat, first of all.
<Sconn> Then take off your pants and underwear, and turn on your lawn sprinklers.
<Sconn> Then get a boom box with a barry manilow CD.
<Sconn> Play the barry manilow CD very loudly while dancing in the hat, with no pants on, in the lawn sprinklers, shouting praises to the JK 2 gods.
<RSJohn> and this worked for you? :P
<``Zak> It's just his hobby
<Sconn> Well...until the cops came, yeah.
<@Randy-sensei> Vietnam uses Dongs as currency
<@Randy-sensei> 1 dong = 100 xu
* @Randy-sensei offers Sconn a dong for a loaf of bread.
<@Sconn> No, is two dong loaf of bread!
<@Randy-sensei> One and half dong!
<@Sconn> No half dong! Two dong or no dong!
<@Randy-sensei> Then no dong loaf of bread!
<@Sconn> Just for that, I sell him bread for one dong!
<@Sconn> One dong loaf!
<@Randy-sensei> I give you one dong!
<Triani> Cay!
<@Cay-Qel> Tri!
<@Sconn> No, for you price is two dong!
<@Randy-sensei> One dong!
<@Sconn> I said two dong, that final price, capitalist pig dog!
* @Randy-sensei gives Sconn two dong
* @Sconn gives Randy bread.
* @Randy-sensei cheers
<@Sconn> I got two dong for one dong loaf of bread!
<@Sconn> I shrewd dong business man!
<@Jagged> ...
<Sconn> Aunt Jemima's not my aunt, she's black.
<kailen> a bit yes
<`Kaz> Sconn DOESNT CARE ABOUT BLACK PEOPLE
* kailen gasps
<kailen> I'm black
<TheShadow> Sconn, are you a little racist?
<LCable> Yes, his pimp hand is definitely racist.
<Sconn> ...nah dude, I'd love to express my love to a busty nubian princess. I'd express it all over her.
<`Kaz> 10 points to Sconn
<`Kaz> 0 to Cable
<kailen> lol
<`Kaz> You're going to need to really step up your game
<Swifty> I tried to argue with Kaz, which Sconn promptly recommended against :P
<VA_Raven> You should take the recommendation.
<Swifty> he said:
<Swifty> <Swifty> Is it possible to fight Kaz and win?
<Swifty> <Sconn> No.
<Swifty> <Sconn> Because, like a woman
<Swifty> <Sconn> Kaz defies logic in an argument
<VA_Raven> He is correct.
<Swifty> Checks book of "What to do in RS" "#1 Listen to the FC
<Swifty> "
<Swifty> :P
<VA_Raven> #1 would be 'Do not mess with Kaz'.
<VA_Raven> #2 would be 'Listen to the FC'
<Swifty> What happens if you mess with Kaz?
<Swifty> :P
<VA_Raven> You will Engage The Rage.
<Swifty> #3 'Do not let Sconn or Spokes anywhere near alcohol when they're on duty' :P
<Sconn> C'mere. Don't make me take you out behind the woodshed and learn you good.
<LCLNachos> no pa! please don't! I swears I didn'st means to take that thar wood and shove it up ma's ass, I swears it
<Sconn> Derr... <Sconn> Wow. <Sconn> Nachos. <Sconn> Just...wow. * Kell_Horn watches everyone bow down before Nachos :P
<Sconn> See cause the thing is, when he said wood, I wasn't thinking like...smooth polished wood...I was thinking like..spiky splintery wood.
<Kell_Horn> ow <Kell_Horn> just imagine if you got a splinter...
<LCL_Apoc> lol ass splinter.
<LCL_Apoc> 'How did you get this ma'am?' 'My son shoved a log up my ass' <LCLNachos> yea, thats hicksville USA for ya
<LCLNachos> see, down there, they don't have matches so they need friction to start fires, so by repeatedly shoving wood in someone's ass...well, you get the picture
(VA-Shik) ..
(VA-Shik) so I guess some of the chicks have literal hot asses
<LCL_Apoc> I think Shik has performed this action many times.
(VA-Shik) ...
14:14:24: *** Licah_ has been kicked off channel #rs_bar_and_Grill by Sconn (How does it feel, bitch?)
14:14:36: *** Sconn has been kicked off channel #rs_bar_and_Grill by X ((LicahFox) GREAT, BITCH.)
14:14:36: *** Sconn (~motters@63-228-46-226.mpls.qwest.net) has joined channel #rs_bar_and_Grill
14:14:37: *** Mode change "+o Sconn" on #rs_bar_and_Grill by X
14:14:37: Zeke`: lol
14:14:42: *** Licah_ (Licah@ip-187-228.main.oberlin.edu) has joined channel #rs_bar_and_Grill
14:14:42: *** Mode change "+o Licah_" on #rs_bar_and_Grill by X
14:14:53: *** Licah_ has been kicked off channel #rs_bar_and_Grill by Sconn (SUCKLE MY TEAT)
14:14:53: *** Mode change "-ooo GizAFK SairAFK Sconn" on #rs_bar_and_Grill by GoExposGo
14:14:54: *** You have been kicked off channel #rs_bar_and_Grill by X (### MASSDEOPPRO TRIGGERED! ###)
[23:04:01] * Joins: Sconn (~motters@63-228-61-233.mpls.qwest.net)
[23:04:06] * Joins: Ciredik (Ciredik@d60-65-72-158.col.wideopenwest.com)
[23:04:27] * Jon` walks beside Randy "I can't believe I could do that with the tree..."
[23:04:34] <Randy> GM: Renan, can you get Sconn. Raven, take Zak please?
[23:04:44] <Randy> "Beginners luck." :-P
[23:05:07] <COL_Raven> <<Done :P>>
[23:05:08] <Sconn> <<That's...one of the weirdest lines I've heard coming into a sim.>>
[23:05:13] * Jon` grins "I like it, I am a beginer from here out"
<Skrevish> I wish to state, that I may or may not be on viciden right now
<Sconn> I hope you are.
<Skrevish> Considering I read you name as Scope yep.
<Tawny_40> Sconn IS minty fresh
